How Do I Go Back To Normal After This? (TASSP-Part-3)

Jul 24, 2025

On Saturday, I took part in one of TASSP’s immersive experiences, School Detention. It’s a roleplay event with a little bratting and a lot of spanking. The organizers do a great job of making it feel like actual detention so you can really get into the headspace. (Side note: Thanks to the organizers of this party for fitting me in from the waitlist. AND if you go to national parties and roleplay is your thing, sign up for these - on time!)

I spent the rest of the day connecting with old friends. When you’re in the kink scene for even a few short years, you start making friends from all over the world, and these parties give you a rare opportunity to connect in person.

The Guy and I didn’t see much of each other, but we’d periodically pass each other in the halls or hotel atrium. Even with the space and time between us, I felt a buzzing excitement. Like the connection hadn’t dimmed. That excitement peaked when I received another text midway through the day. He wanted to repeat and expand on our corner time. I texted back with a list of roleplay ideas. Not just things that could happen at TASSP. Scenes that would take time and privacy.

Desires and fantasies I usually wouldn’t share because they felt ‘too much’. As if it should be scary to let someone see me this closely.

With him it didn’t feel scary at all. Maybe because we’re both spankos. Maybe because embarrassment had already been stripped from the equation. Not only did he meet my ideas with enthusiasm, he added his own spin. I travel a lot and I enjoy road trips. That was something The Guy and I had in common. I told him I’ve always fantasized about being told that I was so bad my Dom was going to pull the car over and punish me. He replied and said he’d pull over on the hard shoulder, bend me over the car and spank me in front of all the passing cars. He told me how he’d want to be “Daddy” for the entire trip. That’s the fantasy. Days-long roleplays that we wouldn’t step out of. Hard to do without a lot of trust and some time to plan.

That night, we were able to sit together at dinner. We danced and took a few photos. I watched him dance with others and felt the jealousy creep back in. Softer this time, but still there.

In the past, I would have done one of two things. Emotionally exploded, walked over and pulled him aside to ‘talk’. Or I’d shut down completely. Coldly. Walked away and not speak to him for the rest of the weekend. I’ve done both. Neither option felt right here. I wanted to play this out, to take the jealousy and make it something else. So I decided right there, I was going to do something different. I named it. When he finished dancing, I told him I felt jealous and wanted to PLAY with it. I wanted to take the feeling and expose it fully. Bring it into the light. We were going to bring it into a scene.

After the dinner party finished, I went back to my room and changed into some revealing lingerie. A little more scene-worthy than my cocktail dress but not something I could walk the halls in, so I covered up with a nightgown and made my way to his room.

When he opened his hotel room door, I stepped straight into the scene and out of my nightgown.

“Tonight I was feeling jealous, so I decided to flaunt myself in front of other men because you were playing with other girls.”

He didn’t hesitate. He flipped the switch fast and played right into the degradation fantasies we’d discussed.

“I didn’t know you were such a slut.”

Strong start.

“Daddy gets to play with anyone he wants but you belong to me. And only me.”

His tone was biting. He sounded angry. That change alone was enough to turn me on.

Being owned was such a deep desire that I usually never let anyone play with it. The vulnerability it takes to feel safe in enjoying it while knowing it was just a fantasy could be… too much. Again, he just made me feel safe enough to lean into it.

He threw me on the bed, face down and ass up. The spanking started with his hand. Hard. My skin was already sensitive from yesterday’s play. I knew it was a warm-up and that whatever was coming next was going to wreck me.

He told me not to move, and I didn’t. Not one muscle. There was no upside to disobeying him. I didn’t want to be anywhere else but the anticipation of what was about to happen was fucking with my head.

I heard him rooting through a drawer and knew he was picking an implement.

When he came back to the bed, I was so desperate for the anticipation to end, I wanted him to start spanking me again.

The first strike made me flinch. It was wooden.

The following strikes were no more forgiving. After about 10 swats, my body involuntarily twisted out of position. I couldn’t stay still because I needed to get as far away from the pain as possible. That proved to be a mistake. He grabbed hold of my hips and pinned me down.

“You’re going to get thirty more with the hairbrush.”

Panic set in.

“No!” I screamed.

That was about three times as many as I’d just taken.

“I can’t take that. I really can’t. It’s not fair”

He didn’t miss a beat. “You can and you will. As far as you’re concerned, I’m the sole judge of what’s fair. And that’s the only option you have.”

Helpless. I felt completely helpless. This scenario was way hotter in my fantasies. Living it made me question my life decisions that led me to this spot.

There were so many thoughts running through my head. I had asked for this. The spanking, the jealousy play and the degradation as punishment. Part of me wanted to prove something just by taking the pain. I wasn’t going to use my safe word because I wanted to see where the scene was going to go. Things were too exciting to tap out but the intensity was moving into ‘overwhelmed’ territory. And because of this I wasn’t really focused on the actual scene we were in. He noticed the shift and refocused my attention.

“You’re going to count them. One, Sir. Two, Sir. Do you understand?”

I nodded.

I wish I could describe each strike. But I dropped into subspace too fast. I floated. I counted, but I don’t remember much else. Only the feeling of surrender. It’s a strange headspace to exist in. Elated and calm at the same time. Nothing felt overwhelming because I knew there was nothing I needed to think about - except counting.

After 30, he put the implement on the bedside table.

“Take off your clothes and go stand in the corner ”

I moved without thinking, peeling off my small bra and thong. From the corner of my eye, I could see him undressing too. He’d expanded the corner time, just like he said.

I remembered telling him that it wasn’t fair he had seen me naked, but I hadn’t seen him. So I turned my head to peek.

He barked at me to turn back.

“If you want to see, you’re going to have to beg.”

Begging usually doesn’t work for me. It crosses into degradation in a way I’ve always resisted.

But I was deep in it.

“May I please turn around? Please?”

He shook his head. “You’re going to have to try harder than that.”

Next thing I knew my body had taken on a mind of its own! I was kneeling and saying things I did not want to say. Words that have never come out of my mouth.

“Please, Daddy. I promise to be such a good girl for you. I’m yours and only yours. I’ll do whatever you say.”

Still facing the corner. Begging.

His next words shocked me back into myself “Crawl to me.”

I don’t crawl for anyone. That was something other subs did but not my switchy self. There were lines I simply didn't cross. I’ve thought about it, fantasized about it, sure. But I DEFINITELY didn’t do it.

Except I did.

I turned and crawled, on all fours, to him. He was stroking his cock and looking down at me. He looked like something out of a movie if the movie was a little unhinged. Tall, cut, and absurdly hot, but with this quiet intensity that felt more dangerous than charming. I felt a drop of something wet dripping down my thigh. My pussy was soaking wet. The mix of fear, degradation and a beautiful man standing over me was pushing me to my limits. This was everything I always wanted from a scene.

He instructed me to lie face down on the bed. We were back to the script. He wanted to finish like the first nigh but I wanted something slightly different. So I risked more punishment and asked for what I wanted.

“I want to touch myself and I want to do it FOR you.”

He said yes. Of course he did. And promptly added his own spin by leaning into the Daddy role.

“Get on the bed and touch yourself. Daddy will teach you how to do it.”

That was hot. But I wanted to go even further. I asked him to grab my phone and record it.

He did.

“Touch yourself for Daddy.” he purred. His voice was calm and commanding.

“Can Daddy take videos of you whenever he wants?”

“Yes, Sir.”

“It’s all for Daddy. Daddy can do whatever he wants to you”

“Yes, Sir.” I would have agreed to anything as long as it ended in an orgasm soon.

“Look at you humiliating yourself in front of Daddy. Just to come. You little slut”

Was he reading my mind?! It was humiliating and I loved it. I was more than happy to be a slut. His slut.

“Isn’t it embarrassing to have Daddy filming it all?”

Being reminded of the embarrassing situation I’d put myself in was the final straw. I was ready to come. I didn’t know if I was supposed to ask or not, so I didn’t. And I came, hard. So did he, all over me. His hot cum covered me from my torso all the way up to my face. I wasn’t really sure how he had that much cum.

Reality started to set in and I became aware of how wet and sticky I was. It’s funny how that transition can happen so quickly. I asked him if it was okay to shower in his room. There was no way I could walk back to my room, covered in cum. When I finished cleaning off, he pulled me into bed. No shift. No weirdness. He held me like I was something valuable. Like I hadn't just been covered in submission, spit and sex, ten minutes before. Yes, that’s what every good Dom should be able to do but it didn’t change how special it felt.

And I remember thinking—